Gervais Update

Microsoft didn't want you to see those Ricky Gervais training videos.

Whet your appetite

In the tradition of The Gallery of Regrettable Food, Wendy McClure released The Amazing Mackerel Pudding Plan: Classic Diet Recipe Cards from the 1970s earlier this year. Check out more of her tasty recipe finds here.

Christ-centered remote vibrating panties now available

"Book22 is owned and operated by Kevin and Joy Wilson. We are a Christian couple who have been married for over 11 years now. We have prayed every step of the way for guidance on what products to offer on this site."

One big hurdle, though, is the lack of instructions, especially when you remove all of the objectionable packaging:

"I get emails all the time asking how products work. I really wish these things came with directions! The truth is they hardly ever do. The Screaming O and The Big O are the best so far for actually giving us a clue of how to use and care for the product."

Credit: Klevay.

Attn: Wal-Mart Haters (yes, you with the PhD)

I don't like Wal-Mart because I hate China.

Having said that, an interesting piece written by the head of FLOW (what an awful name), writes:

Is it heroic to raise one person up out of poverty each month, but merely a statistic to raise a million up?

Incidentally, organic granola lover Whole Paycheck funds FLOW, not the usual pro-Sam Walton crowd is it?

Fun with exchange students

Someone out there has surely thought of this before, but a great social experiment just occurred to me for those in the teaching profession. First, get all of your students (minus the foreign exchange student) to act as though everything is normal. Then, proceed to speak in gibberish for an indefinite period of time. Finally, observe and record your results in the PoF comment section.

Be careful what you wish for

"You asked for glitter...and so we are giving you tons of it!"

Who gets the best parking spaces at college?

Via DoL: "Richard Vedder blogs (hat tip to E. Frank): 'When asked why [university faculty] teach so little, we reply "teaching is only a small part of our duties." But who decided that? The donors to universities? State legislatures? No. The universities themselves have decided to downplay instruction in order to do what the faculty wants.'

"As my former colleague Dwight Lee has been known to say, if you want to know for whose benefit the universities are run, observe who gets the best parking spaces. (Not the students but the administrators and faculty.) At Wal-Mart, by contrast, they ask the employees to park away from the building."

Everyone wins!

"Everyone Wins is exactly that. EVERY time you enter our contest you'll win a prize! It's that easy! It could be $10 off a John Tesh CD, $100 worth of merchandise in the Everyone Wins Online Store or the Grand Prize; a 7-day Cruise for 2 with John Tesh in the Mexican Riviera! Everyone Wins!"

Astro-Equity

The People's Cube on Pluto.

You Think You Have Problems

I have a friend who is half-Armenian, half-Turkish.

Today he got engaged to a woman who is half-Serbian, half-Croatian.

Hmm.

Demolish Capitalist Lies

PoF, you are a genocidal talk radio devotee because you work with non-union people!

The People's Research Institute (PRI) has found a way of stopping right-wing ideology in America and ending our losses at the ballot box: we need to face our opponent's "facts" and "logic" by learning how to frame the debate. The Progressive Truth Generator™ will help you to set the terms of debate on issues in your favor and quickly terminate all discussion!

* * *

Also, be sure to shop at Che-Mart to get great deals on merchandise like:

Overexposed

Thank you for your interest. We hope you are not part of Borat conspiracy against Kazakhstan. We will not become a William Hung for the international community!

Like Monty Python, Borat is best when not imitated by adoring fans. Just enjoyed privately.

Boo Hoo

Just can't get enough of that Hurricane Katrina coverage.

"People in Utah don't know how to act toward black people."

But then again, maybe they do.

They say economic opportunity and lower crime rates there are offset by subtle racism the black family encounters.

How dare we not be robbed and then given jobs. Those are some crafty racists.

One evacuee, who is evidently well over 200 years of age, reflects:

"We used to live in Africa and we were moved to New Orleans and we had to adapt there," he said. "Now we are in Utah and we have to adapt here. We're tired of adapting."

Sometimes I think I should thank Stalin for his Holodomor and the "encouragement" it gave my forebearers to move to the Cleveland ghettos (next to lots of black people who'd already gotten the best slums). I sure as hell prefer being a Ukrainian-American to being a Ukrainian-Ukrainian. And if my time in Nigeria and Rwanda tells me anything, Salt Lake City is not a bad consolation prize.

In any case, it could be worse. They could be from Detroit and still be in Detroit.

LikeBetter

Via M&C: "Keep choosing which photos you like better, when the brain turns pink, it knows something about you. Click on it to find out what."

Further testing

It seems that others are more open to Coke made with sugar than myself. In addition, however, it seems that for the most part people wouldn't have any idea what cola products they put in their mouths if it were not for helpful labels.

Action philosophers!

"ACTION PHILOSOPHERS is a comic book series detailing the lives and thoughts of history's A-list brain trust in a hip and humorous way that proves that philosophy is not just the province of boring tweed-enveloped college professors."

Credit: Klevay.

Paris Hilton Parody

Brought to use by SpicySprouts.com." There's another great parody featuring a hefty hairy guy here.

Nerds on nerds

Newsarama points out a new resource: "Comic fans looking for scholarly criticism of their favorite comics and graphic novels can check out the University of Florida’s peer-reviewed, open access journal ImageTexT, which is 'dedicated to the interdisciplinary study of comics and related media.'"

Improv Everywhere takes it slow at Home Depot

Via M&C: "225 people walk in slow motion at Home Depot, then they all freeze for 5 minutes."

Marc and Matt Movie Review: Gummo

The rural agrarian ideal of Jefferson and Crevecoeur is shown for what it really is in the 1997 film Gummo. For those of you who have seen Harmony Korine’s first film, Kids (1995), his follow-up takes adolescent depravity to a whole new level.

Perhaps this new level was exactly what Korine was shooting for, in an effort to show that childhood hooliganism is not just a big city phenomenon. At least the kids in Kids appeared to have no serious screw-ups in their gene pools. Of course, there is always the possibility that the director is merely out to shock and disturb his audience. If that was the case, he most certainly lived up to the task.

Read more...

The movie begins with the nearly unintelligible murmuring of Jacob Sewell (The Road to Wellville) as Gummo and then moves to a nice shot of a dirty near-naked adolescent taking a leak off a highway overpass. Things go downhill from there. Featuring young transvestites, Ritalin-popping tennis star-wannabes, homosexual dwarves, prostitutes with down’s syndrome and an assortment of other oddities – there is no comparison on the market today for this kind of insanity on film.

The action takes place in the tornado-ravaged town of Xenia, Ohio (self-proclaimed "Bicycle Capital of the Midwest"). While perhaps the characters and landscape depicted do not represent the entirety of that “fair” state, from all other accounts these characteristics are definitely the norm.

Gummo’s profession is that of a cat-killer, and he shares his responsibilities with Tummler (Nick Sutton of Underground). Both engage in this activity to make a buck by selling the corpses to the local Chinese restaurant. Again, this depiction may not accurately represent all those currently in operation.

Shot in the familiar documentary style of Kids, this movie faced similar allegations of engaging in shock tactics and blatant “tardsploitation.” We found, however, that as members of the MTV generation, the material was all in all not nearly as shocking as, say, Jerry Falwell’s predictions that the Jewish Anti-Christ walks among us. And, in all honesty, while there were several scenes where mentally-challenged individuals are shown in a less than appealing light, this seems to be little more than an attempt of Korine’s to depict small town life as we all know it really is.

It ought to be notes here that while we were not overly shocked with the images presented in Gummo, this is not to say that there isn’t plenty of potentially offensive material. Nonetheless, no other film gets to the heart of what it is to be a kid in small town America as well as Gummo. Any who have a thirst for knowledge about this subject would be foolish to deprive themselves of the experience of a film that is at the same time both truly depraved and inspired.

Fast Food Rockers

Every time I try to think of a way to describe this, so many adjectives and comparisons come to mind that I think it officially passes the "it's a new genre" threshold.

Interrobang Alert

Spotted in a Mary Worth strip by Comics Curmudgeon.

Teachers Count!

The NEA, the AFT, Marvel, OfficeMax, and Teachers Count have teamed up to provide kids (and kids at heart!) with "Brain Drain," an action-packed tale featuring Spiderman, the Fantastic Four, and a bunch of teachers. Readers learn that teachers "always find a way to succeed," and that "teachers count," especially when one of them saves the day by flinging a ball of OfficeMax-brand rubber bands. Run, don't walk, to your nearest OfficeMax store and pick up your FREE copy today!

Defining bullshit

Princeton Professor of Philosophy Emeritus Harry G. Frankfurt created a lot of buzz last year with the release of his treatise On Bullshit, in which he claims "to give a rough account of what bullshit is and how it differs from what it is not." Sure, Penn & Teller's "Bullshit" is an entertaining program, but if you want to hear the topic discussed in a dry academic manner with an interviewer that's clearly uncomfortable, then this video is for you.

Barkitecture

If your pup's a fan of modern art and design, then the Pawpidou Center is a must-have. See this and other hound homes at the annual Barkitecture Event and Gala Auction.

Weeniecello

Via Cynical-C: "Over the years, I've tried various sorts of infusions, with vodka and other liquors. Fruit and herb-infused are the best known, and are often wonderful. But what I like is meat. Where's the infusion for people like me? I felt disenfranchised, and alone, especially after some research on the interwebs revealed a real lack of meat-based liqueurs. It would be up to me to blaze the trail.

"I decided that a hot dog based infusion would work best. Not as assertive as chorizo, but bolder than pork chops or steak; in addition, the preservatives in the dogs would lend themselves to prolonged infusion."

Free air conditioning

Via DoL: "I came across this 'how to' tip describing how to air condition your home for free. Well, not really. It basically comes down to digging a large hole, insulating it very well, and then filling it with snow/ice over the course of the winter. It's an interesting concept - one that was used in the very beginning of air conditioning (Biltmore or some other 'estate' had a similar setup in the late 1800s) - but doesn't seem worth the trouble.

"I haven't checked all the math, but assuming it is correct, the author suggests about 1 million pounds of snow/ice would do the trick (for three months worth of air conditioning)."

Ferret Clothes

Because ferrets need fashion too.

Union bees launch pre-emptive strike to prevent South from rising again

Via Boing Boing: "Massive yellow jacket nests are being found in barns, abandoned cars, and empty houses in southern Alabama. Entomologists say that the reason for the large nests is something of a mystery.

"'The largest nest (entomologist Dr. Charles) Ray has inspected this year filled the interior of a weathered 1955 Chevrolet parked in a rural Elmore County barn. That nest was about the size of a tire in the rear floor seven weeks ago, but quickly spread to fill the entire vehicle, the property owner, Harry Coker, said. Four satellite nests around it have gotten into the eaves of the barn, about 300 yards from his home.'"

Football and babies

Canton, Ohio - home of The Pro Football Hall of Fame, Marilyn Manson, and a whole lot of pregnant teens:

"This may seem impossible to you, but it’s true. Sixty-five — again, 65 — of Timken High School’s 490 girl students are pregnant.

"According to the Canton Health Department, through July, 104 of 586 babies born to Canton residents in Aultman Hospital and Mercy Medical Center — the county’s largest hospitals — had mothers between 11 and 19. That’s nearly 18 percent, or three times the total number of babies born at the same hospitals to teen parents living elsewhere in Stark County and beyond."

Haiku Cinema - Late August Edition

No pressure to contribute (but feel free), I just thought I'd share some haiku about movies I've seen in the last two weeks.
Spoilers below the fold.



A Scanner Darkly

Never has Downey
- Ok, so Keanu too -
Been so rightly cast.


The Matador

Pierce in kinky boots
Lonely assassin panics
Kinnear will save him!


Little Miss Sunshine

Penultimate scene:
My Friedrich Nietzsche Brings All
The Boys to the Yard


The Descent

Lost with cave crawlers
Greek tragedy meets horror
Gotta stab a ho.

Labor Negotiations, Russian Sports Edition

MOSCOW (Reuters) - Russia has declared an all-out war on the National Hockey League (NHL), accusing the North Americans of stealing its best players.
...
"We can't just sit around and do nothing while the NHL takes our best players," Tretyak told local media. But the NHL said it would not negotiate compensation packages with any Russian club after the European nation refused to sign a transfer agreement with the North American league. Russia remains the only major hockey power not to join the deal, approved by the International Ice Hockey Federation in 2005.

Under the agreement Metallurg would have received a basic $200,000 fee for Malkin. The Russian club reportedly wanted at least 10 times more. Tretyak said the Malkin case was the main reason behind their decision not to sign the agreement while the Metallurg boss slammed the offer as "disgraceful."

Malkin has faxed a letter to Metallurg, asking them to annul his contract, which he said he had signed under pressure. Velichkin denying putting any pressure on Malkin.

"He talks about pressure. What pressure?" Velichkin said. You can ask militia (Russian police) about pressure. Pressure is when they bang your head against a wall radiator.

"As far as the letter he faxed to us, it wasn't written by Malkin so I think it's a pure fabrication. I just threw it in the garbage can." Asked about the sum he was seeking for Malkin, Velichkin said: "Before his disappearance I was asking for $2 million from Pittsburgh but now I want more, a lot more."

Rollerblading in ATL WaterPark

MIT Engineers Test Tinfoil Hat Efficacy

Among a fringe community of paranoids, aluminum helmets serve as the protective measure of choice against invasive radio signals. We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find that although on average all helmets attenuate invasive radio frequencies in either directions (either emanating from an outside source, or emanating from the cranium of the subject), certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified. These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC). Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We speculate that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason.

Get them a MacArthur grant, stat.

Worship at every meal

Via Cakehead: "Put the Image of Jesus RIGHT ON FOOD!"

"Imagine serving heavenly hotcakes at the next church breakfast. Worship at every meal with JesusPan."

Beatitudo

Hot on the heels of the incredibly successful television series concept "The Littlest Lawnmower," here's another sure-fire hit for studio execs (probably at the WB).

The year is 1985. Boy band Menudo will face their inevitable decline all too soon, but for the moment they are at the height of their fame. "Menuditis" is spreading in epidemic proportions, and the Christian rock industry needs something to counter the hysteria. Petra and Stryper just can't offer youth group teens the infectious beats that they're craving. What's the answer?

Enter Beatitudo. In the dramedy tradition of "7th Heaven," the series will follow the ups and downs, highs and lows of a family trying to stay together in the topsy-turvy world of Christian boy band fame. This one can't miss.

Ricky Gervais: Office Values

Ricky Gervais reprises his role as David Brent to offer his consulting advice to Microsoft. Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

Armor of God PJ's

via Presurfer

What would Keats think?

Researchers at Akishima Laboratories (Mitsui Zosen), working in conjunction with professor Shigeru Naito of Osaka University, have developed a device that uses waves to draw text and pictures on the surface of water.

The device, called AMOEBA (Advanced Multiple Organized Experimental Basin), consists of 50 water wave generators encircling a cylindrical tank 1.6 meters in diameter and 30 cm deep (about the size of a backyard kiddie pool). The wave generators move up and down in controlled motions to simultaneously produce a number of cylindrical waves that act as pixels. The pixels, which measure 10 cm in diameter and 4 cm in height, are combined to form lines and shapes. AMOEBA is capable of spelling out the entire roman alphabet, as well as some simple kanji characters. Each letter or picture remains on the water surface only for a moment, but they can be produced in succession on the surface every 3 seconds.

In a similar vein, Bruce Shapiro explores the art of motion control with the use of "Art Machines" which he uses to create some amazing public art works.


(latter via Neatorama)

Mark Your Calendars

Coming Soon: Whores of Warcraft
(not to be confused with World of Whorecraft)

(via BoingBoing)

WSJ author misrepresents Torodes

Today's Wall Street Journal contains an article by Christine Gardner in which she claims that Sam and Bethany Torode are "at the center of the movement" of evangelicals against contraception. Gardner bases this statement on the position laid out in the Torodes' 2002 book Open Embrace. A quick visit to Amazon's listing for this book reveals that the Torodes have since converted to Greek Orthodoxy and no longer advocate natural family planning. Gardner merely mentions that their position has mellowed slightly.

One of the reviewers at Amazon has this to say: "From a slightly more cynical perspective, I can't help but wonder why the Torodes are still allowing the book to be sold if they no longer agree with what they've written in it. While they might be embarassed with the book's contents, I'm sure they're not embarassed about spending the royalties."

The Torodes' explanation for their change of heart is available here.

Thanks for the heads up, Klevay.

Pull them up

"Striped tube Socks became popular in America during the late 1960s and 1970s. This was the time that sports really became popular and Americans starting wearing them like the stars. People would sport these striped tube socks up to the knee. Everyone around America had them on. It was part of my childhood. Skating around town with my tubes on. Yes, Straight from Kmart!

"They kicked rocks in the 80s and disappeared into the 90s. Now here we are in 2006. Skatersocks is all about these sick old school striped tube socks and have been selling them since 2003!"

Marc and Matt Movie Review: Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song

The 1970s brought many welcome changes to the American movie industry: a new realism brought about by the demise of the movie code, an increased role for the director and a willingness on the part of the studio system to invest in good films.

The 70s also witnessed the arrival of a new voice previously unheard in American cinema: that of the African American. And no movie helped to usher in this voice any more than Sweet Sweetback’s Baadasssss Song.

Novelist Melvin Van Peebles (father of the current actor Mario, who appears in the film and recently released his own film about Sweetback) directed, wrote, scored, edited and starred in the 1971 classic. It was the first major film to come out of the black community, and in it Peebles attempts to capture all the rage of the civil rights movement.

Made in the early days of the ratings system it was rated X (as was another classic - Midnight Cowboy) not because it was pornographic – the X rating only later came to have that connotation – but because Van Peebles refused to submit the film to the MPAA (in fact, the ratings for both films were later revised downward to an R). Using even this to his advantage, though, Peebles labeled the rating a badge of honor, touting the film as “rated X by an all-white jury.” It was a box office hit.

Read more...

The film’s plot involves a taciturn black man named Sweet Sweetback whom the “establishment” hunts after he kills two white cops for brutalizing a civil rights activist named Mu-Mu. On Sweet’s run to Mexico, Peebles uses the camera to explore the world of the inner city black man in Los Angeles. Corrupt cops, poverty and the life of the ghetto are all shown with uncompromising clarity.

The film is quite stark and raw, and employs a documentary style. The opening lines, in fact, are meant to illustrate what Peebles had in mind when making this film: “…these lines are not an homage to brutality that the artist has invented, but a hymn from the mouth of reality….” Every movie should strive to live up to this creed, and critics like Michael Medved should ponder it whenever tempted to write some silly drivel about how Hollywood is trying to corrupt America.

This film left quite an impact upon American filmmaking. While it is a bit too socially conscious to be called “blaxploitation,” one may easily see how Sweetback inspired that genre of film. Indeed, many indeed claim the controversial genre begins with this film, although Van Peebles does not agree. In any case, the sexually potent black male, the corrupt cops trying to brutalize him and the undercurrent of support by the black community – staples of blaxploitation films – are all present in Sweetback.

Sweetback was also influential in the black community of the early 70s. Its production was completely the result of efforts by African Americans, including family-friendly comedian Bill Cosby, who put up money to help create the film (Another source of financing was the Directors Guild - they rewarded Peebles compensation for harm on the job after he contracted gonorrhea from one of the actresses while filming of one of the sex scenes). It was so powerful, in fact, that the Black Panthers mandated its viewing for all their members. Very few films have this kind of social significance.

While Sweetback may be flawed in some areas – it is overly long, a bit pretentious and the acting isn’t the best – it definitely is worth watching for its aforementioned depth of impact as well as an unbelievable toilet scene. And on top of this, it is simply an entertaining film which will make you cheer for the triumph of the underdog.

Hang some art

"Haunted Portraits are great for Halloween parties, haunted houses or for the person that simply loves the unusual. The images change without any electronics or mechanics. Simply frame them, hang them and watch the chaos that follows. Every Haunted Portrait is individually crafted in the USA by Norm Lanier, artist and creator of the Haunted product range."

Watch an interview with Lanier here.

Campy?

Herbert's ecological and religious concerns now seem oddly prescient, but this sizzling update, still filled with crazed women who sexually enslave men, sometimes borders on campy 1950s B-movie parody.

Well, next week the latest installment of Never Ending Story IV: The Dune saga will be released.



This of course means it's time to review the official site and see what it has to say about attacks by pro-father Frank, anti-son Brian true believers which have been dubbed Talifan by Herbert the Younger. (Maybe HerbY would have preferred continuing to schlep real estate on Bainbridge Island than endure/capitalize-on his father's legacy.)

Sadly, without even a hint of irony, you can make a donation through the official site to the World Wildlife Fund, Natural Resources Defense Council, Sierra Club, or one of those other anti-Sandworm nut jobs. Did these guys even read the original books? Greens kill the sandworms, the source of all progress (and fun) in the universe!

Prescient. Goddamn right.

Selling capitalism out of business

Via Girl who eats a lot of granola: Adbusters continues its campaign to destroy capitalism by...advertising and selling shoes:

"Yes, Blackspot Shoes is a for-profit venture — we wouldn't have it
any other way. Profits let us do what the shoe has always promised. For round one, we'll launch our TV campaign, and if any network refuses to sell us airtime, we'll haul them into court. Then, if this recycled-tire, organic-hemp Unshwoosher really takes off as a new kind of cool in the sneaker industry, we'll use every penny of profit on kick-ass social campaigns and anti-corporate marketing."

Tobacco and Hezbollah

So many jokes, so little time--ah juxtaposition be thy name:

More Than $125-Million Raised for Humanitarian Aid in Middle East (August 10)

Mayor Bloomberg Donates $125-Million to Anti-Smoking Campaign (August 15)

Of note in the Bloomberg one:

Last year he ranked No. 7 on The Chronicle's list of the most-generous donors by making $144-million in donations to 850 charities....

At a press conference to announce the gift, Mr. Bloomberg signaled that he could become more public in his philanthropy in the coming years. He noted his plans to create a foundation, which will bring additional publicity to his giving.

Perhaps, now is the opportune moment to get the Mayor on board with the PoF Millenniumally Challenged Account.

James is hawking t-shirts

James (of Buckwheat Waffle Love Hour fame) just launched a new clothing line that includes the use of the controversial Belarusian "w," which some claim is a symbol of Polish subjugation:

"Designs Pa-Belarusku is the only place to find a unique design integrating the Pahonia, aka The Chase, an ancient piece of Belarusian heraldry now banned in the country by the ham-fisted dictator, Aliaksandr Lukashenka. This design is particularly special because it also integrates the equally banned white-red-white flag design. On the site, you will also find a series of designs in tribute to the humble 'u kratkoye,' a Cyrillic symbol only used in the Belarusian language that is pronounced like 'w.'"

Pandora

I recognize I'm probably way behind the curve on this, but I just started using Pandora. If listening to music you like for free and trying some new artists in the process sounds good to you, it's worth a try.

"Pandora is the doorway to this vast trove of musical information. With Pandora you can explore to your heart's content. Just drop the name of one of your favorite songs or artists into Pandora and let the Genome Project go. It will quickly scan its entire world of analyzed music, almost a century of popular recordings - new and old, well known and completely obscure - to find songs with interesting musical similarities to your choice. Then sit back and enjoy as it creates a listening experience full of current and soon-to-be favorite songs for you."

Girls Gone Grabblin'

"Catfish Grabblers is now bringing you the first and only Girls Gone Grabblin' video ever produced. Be one of the first to watch and be amazed as 35 Southern women bring you the thrill of catching catfish weighing up to 44lbs. with their hands and wrestling them to the bank."

Need a Job?

Craigslist-Rome needs a "well spoken...sneezy woman"--for US$5,500 plus expenses. Evidently, telecommuting is okay...

Jihadi-blog

You can be a neanderthal and yet not a technophobe: Ahmadinejad blogs (Credit: Todd)

Thank you, horrorshirts

HorrorShirts.com gives the world a present with their Wilford Brimley oatmeal t-shirt.

Inspired by Klevay.

Hayek behind Wikipedia

Via DoL: "Stacy Shiff, in an entertaining New Yorker article on the history of the Wikipedia project, asks Wikipedia founder Jimbo Wales about his influences, and he replies by citing Hayek:

"'I’m very much an Enlightenment kind of guy,' Wales told me. The promise of the Internet is free knowledge for everyone, he recalls thinking. How do we make that happen?

"As an undergraduate, he had read Friedrich Hayek’s 1945 free-market manifesto, 'The Use of Knowledge in Society,' which argues that a person’s knowledge is by definition partial, and that truth is established only when people pool their wisdom."

Good to know

You've heard of a Cleveland Steamer, so what's a Dublin Mudslide?

Isn't This in Revelations?

Isn't there something in the Good Book about the mantle finally collapsing? Maybe it's in the Catholic version...

Barry Popkin asserts:

...the number of overweight or obese people in the world outnumber the starving, with approximately 800 million starving/near starving and 1.3 billion overweight people.

He blames the Juice.

Petey Greene Says Think Twice

Former Washington television and radio talk show host, Ralph Waldo "Petey" Greene, explains How to Eat Watermelon.

(via RetroCrush and Steve and The Sneeze)

Fulfill your fantasy

At Rock n' Roll Fantasy Camp, you can "audition alongside celebrity rock star counselors Simon Kirke (Bad Company/Free), Jeff 'Skunk' Baxter (Doobie Brothers), Artimus Pyle (Lynyrd Skynyrd), Teddy Andreadis (Guns & Roses), Gunnar Nelson (Nelson), Spencer Davis (Spencer Davis Group), Fred Coury (Cinderella), Kelly Keagy (Night Ranger), Michael Lardie (Great White), and many others."

What are you waiting for?!?

Smirnoff: Teapartay

via Tom Palmer's blog.

Real sugar water!

Someone aware of my obsession with finding Coke made with sugar was kind enough to bring me back a couple of bottles from the Dominican Republic. We set up a blind taste test, and here are the shocking results:

Favorite: Good old U.S. high fructose corn syrup Coca-Cola
Runner-up: Meijer brand cola
"Tastes like it's generic": Pepsi
"Whatever that is, I don't like it": Coke made using sugar in the D.R.

Fascinating, folks. The real deal had an off-putting citrus-like quality. So, I guess sugar cola isn't all they say it is. Either that, or the corn lobby has me conviced that their product is the real thing.

Drink up!

Via Cruel: "Brighten up your day (and your home) with a Wanted for Worthless Checks in Montgomery, Alabama coffee mug, greeting cards or jigsaw puzzle!"

Stephen King's Terror Diet

"...two things occurred to me as I did my research (well...some people call it listening to the Blasters and surfing the Net). The first was that writers can never completely escape their natural inclinations.

The second was that I hadn't found a single diet that tried to scare people thin. Can you imagine? In a society that's currently going bugwit about anthrax and North Korean missiles? Not one. And that's just wrong. It was a short jump from there to what follows. Here, then, are the high points of what I call (modestly) the Terror Diet."