Pieces of Flair

Todd Seavey sent this in last week, but I'm only now getting around to posting it. My tardiness should in no way influence your opinion of the following claim or otherwise diminish its importance: Todd may have located the worst movie of all time. I say this having watched such contenders as Battlefield Earth, Masters of the Universe (which, incidentally, is up for a John Woo remake), The Time Machine, Leonard: Part 6, and Nell. In his own words:

So I watch _Lawnmower Man 2_ on video (and it wasn't half bad, sort of a mid-90s pre-Matrix virtual reality adventure, though it's amazing how quickly that sort of thing becomes dated -- remember the days when every computer program was depicted as being an elaborate visual environment, as if programming always looks like playing a game from _Tron_?), but the really shocking thing was the trailer at the beginning of the tape, for a mid-90s comedy I'd never heard of before that caused me to feel more like I was experiencing a real-life version of some bad-movie parody from _The Critic_ than anything I've ever before witnessed, and it went vaguley like this:

VISUALS: Futuristic SWAT team surrounds criminals.
NARRATOR: She was the future's toughest cop...
WHOOPI GOLDBERG: You're under arrest!
NARRATOR: And he...
VISUAL: Big rubber dinosaur tail wiggling around.
NARRATOR: ...was something she never expected!
WHOOPI: He's my partner?!?
BIG CARTOONISH DINOSAUR SUIT WITH ARTICULATED MOUTH MOVEMENTS (AND HE'S WEARING A GARISH SUIT): Hey, baby, I got styyyyyyle!
VISUAL: Whoopi interrogating prisoner, as the dinosaur moves toward the
guy as if to bite his neck.
WHOOPI: You can't keep threatening to eat the prisoners!
MUSIC RISES IN BACKGROUND: "Walk the Dinosaur" by Was Not Was
DINOSAUR: Hey, I gotta be me!
NARRATOR: Meet the future's wackiest clone! Meet...
VISUAL: Dinosaur slaps stiff, upper-crusty woman at gala event on the ass with his tail.
NARRATOR: ...Theodore Rex!!

I watched the trailer three times because it couldn't be real and yet it was real but it couldn't be real.