Congressional Ballin'

President's Day is overrated; Congress is where it's at:



This (above) combined with this (below) equals awesome.

Clemens: You want answers?

Congressman: I think I’m entitled to them.

Clemens: You want answers?

Congressman: I want the truth!

Clemens: You can’t handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has baseballs. And those balls have to be hit by men with bats. Who’s gonna do it? You? You,Congressman? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for steroids and you curse HGH. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that HGH, while illegal, probably sells tickets. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, sells tickets…You don’t want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that mound. You need me on that mound. We use words like fastall, slider, splitfinger…we use these words as the backbone to a life spent playing a sport. You use ‘em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and falls asleep to the Sportscenter clips I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide them! I’d rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a bat and dig in. Either way, I don’t give a damn what you think you’re entitled to!

Congressman: Did you order the HGH?

Clemens: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.

Congressman: Did you order the HGH?

Clemens: You’re goddamn right I did!!

The inspiration of cheap perfume

Where would rock be without this staple? Who knew the music industry owed so much to Journey? Both questions are equally frightening.

Here's a sampling of the void that would exist without cheap perfume:

- Bobby Borchers, "Cheap Perfume And Candlelight," 1977

"Your prey was out there dressed to kill
In cheap perfume and candlelight"

- Journey, "Don’t Stop Believin’," Escape, 1981

"A singer in a smokey room; A smell of wine and cheap perfume; For a smile they can share the night; It goes on and on and on and on"

- Pavement, "Perfume-V," Slanted & Enchanted: Luxe & Reduxe, 2002

"when it looks life a wife's ex-plot; we'll cover all the rugs with cheap perfume"

- Fall Out Boy, "I Slept With Someone In Fall Out Boy And All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me," From Under the Cork Tree, 2005

"Douse yourself in cheap perfume it's; So fitting, so fitting of the way you are"

- Avril Lavigne, "Everything Back But You," The Best Damn Thing, 2007

"Smelled like cheap perfume; And it didn't smell like you"

- Modest Mouse, "We've Got Everything," We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank, 2007

"Flat Top Tony got all messed up split his lip chasing cheap perfume"

Tentacle Implants

I'm not sure when Tattoos for Toddlers will start offering tentacle implants, but it sure seems like a winning combination to me.

Play it again, Sam...

Via Janet.

Once more with feeling...

Happy Valentine's Day

Love,
PoF

Catholic Costumes for Children

Catholic Costumes for Children not only provides handmade outfits from farm women in Kansas, but it also offers what the site apparently considers anti-pedophilia costume advice:

"if your older boy is portraying St. Isaac Jogues, provide fake bloody fingers - the Iroquois chewed off the Saint's fingers after seeing him offer the Mass because they thought he was performing magic!"

Via The Presurfer.

Do the Lurch

Stolen from Todd.

Lang Lang gets some shoes

Shoe manufacturer Adidas is looking to challenge Nike's success with something known as the "Air Jordan" by carving out a niche shoe for their own:

"Adidas will start selling a Lang Lang line of sneakers next May, and the pianist is already wearing them. They are firm soled, black with gold stripes, and emblazoned (also in gold) with Lang Lang's name along the side."

With any luck, the commercial endorsement will be as successful for the company as when it paired up with the band Korn.

Jesus and Buddha are roommates

Sure, it's no Jesus vs. Vampires, but Saint Young Men - in which Jesus and Buddha decide to take a break together by renting an apartment in present-day Tokyo - gets to say more about holy fashion:

"Perhaps to allow them to blend in somewhat, they are a suitably stylish pair — with Jesus even boasting a T-shirt that boldly proclaims, 'Dad, Me and the Holy Spirit.'"

Just in time for Super Tuesday...nevermind

Harry Shearer's excellent "Silent Debate," courtesy of H&R.

Bonus: "Famed anti-tax crusader" Lady Godiva rides again to endorse Ron Paul!

10 Star Wars Action Figure Look Alikes

Nowadays, it seems like every celebrity under the sun has an action figure. Corey Feldman just got one, and Cary Elwes has one on the way, and if that isn’t a sign of the apocalypse, I don’t know what is. (Granted, it’s for the long overdue The Princess Bride, but still…Cary Elwes!) But what about the toys that unintentionally resemble celebrities? In its early years, the Star Wars line suffered from a lot of terrible likenesses, and while we couldn’t find any that looked like Cary Elwes (although there were too many who looked like Corey Feldman to count), we did find ten figures that were the spitting images of actors they were absolutely, positively not intended to resemble.

Although I found this Topless Robot article via BoingBoing, I was surprised to discover the author is actually by my friend (and high school chum), Zach Oat. Zach has also blogged on the 10 Most Disturbing Smurfs and Iron Man or Downey. Good Stuff.

Of E.D. and outlaw country

A farm boy from the North Carolina mountains, he had found his way into quackery by the time he reached his 20s, and though a brief flirtation with "electric medicine from Germany" -- "injecting colored water into rear ends" -- got him into jail in South Carolina in 1913, he just headed west and bounced right back.

Jonathan Yardley's fascinating book review in yesterday's Washington Post tells the story of Dr. John R. Brinkley, whose "miracle" goat gonad cure and his efforts to advertise it led to the cultural phenomenon of outlaw country and made him one of the worst serial killers in US history.

More on Brinkley here.

Via jeremylott.net.

For Those Not Watching the Superbowl

I'm a little disappointed in a certain Ukrainian ex-pat for not bringing this to my attention sooner. Sadly, Ukraine's Verka Serduchka only took second place in the 2007 Eurovision contest. The Serbs won it with Marija Šerifović's "Prayer" (aka "Snore"). For more on the Eurovision awards, see PoF's 2006 coverage here.
Via WFMU's Beware of the Blog.

I bear-ly love you

Tell your loved one how you really feel this year with Subversive Cross Stitch Valentine kits by Natalie Dee.

Sarah Silverman and Matt Damon

Brilliant.

That not-so-smurfy feeling

Sad news from Croatia.

It's like a scene from a psychedelic dream or some cheese-induced nightmare.

But the bizarre sight of almost 400 grown men, women and children covered head to foot in blue paint wearing white trousers and floppy white hats is actually a serious record-breaking attempt.

The record they were trying to smash was the much-coveted "most Smurfs gathered together at one time."

But it wasn't meant to be.

Go here for the tragic conclusion.

On the bright side, at least paint comes off.

Via H&R.

"He called the s#!t, poop!"

Placing flaming bags of crap on a neighbor's porch is so fourth grade. Now, via poopsenders.com, you can anonymously and safely send piles of crap to your neighbors, boss, co-workers, ex or whoever else pisses you off. It's clean (for you) and affordable!

They also have a "raunchy" version of the site available here. What are you waiting for?

Headline source: one of the greatest movies of all time.

Via Shaun.

"I could chew Alaska."

So says an anonymous compulsive ice chewer quoted in a recent WSJ piece on the latest craze to sweep the nation: Pagophagia!

Also, I thought I lived in the Bible Belt, but according to some chewers, the South is the "Chew Belt."

Via Jacob.

The Hawaii-Chair

Via Cynical-C.

Cheeseburger in a Can!

While we're on the topic of bizarre foodstuffs, go ahead and order yourself some canned cheeseburgers, you know, for camping. Those Swiss with their zany woodsmen ways.

The folks at Gizmodo can't decide if this development is really cool or really awful. It's that last one.

Via the Agitator.

Rap Snacks

Rap Snacks: The Official Snacks of Hip Hop. I almost bought some of these today, thinking "I should have a party, just to invite people over to admire my Rap Snacks..." Then I remembered I have a blog for this sort of thing. I think my favorite part of Rap Snacks may be the inspirational message that appears with each rapper. Stat Quo's Sour Cream and Cheddar tells us to "Pursue your college degree," while Murphy Lee's Red Hot Riplets simply encourages us to "Pimp education." Much can be learned from Rap Snacks indeed.

'For Sale - beautiful pink "vagina couch"'

...the couch has some scuffmarks and stains around the bottom from being moved, but otherwise is in excellent shape.

Full listing here.

If that and truck nuts don't complete your anatomical design scheme, splurge on Jingle Jugs for those boring, bare walls. Or, maybe not.

Black is the new black

Seriously.

U.S. researchers said on Tuesday they have made the darkest material on Earth, a substance so black it absorbs more than 99.9 percent of light.

Made from tiny tubes of carbon standing on end, this material is almost 30 times darker than a carbon substance used by the U.S. National Institute of Standards and Technology as the current benchmark of blackness.

Via io9.

O'Connell does Cruise

In the fine tradition of Seth Green as Chris Crocker, Jerry O'Connell moves from a PTS to a full-blown SP with this video.

You would think he might be concerned about Hollywood's revenge on his acting career, but perhaps he figures he has little to lose at this point.

Ode to the pickled watermelon rind

"But in a jar put up by Felicity,
The summer which maybe never was
Has been captured and preserved.
And when we unscrew the lid
And slice off a piece
And let it linger on our tongue;
Unicorns become possible again."

- "Reflections on a Gift of Watermelon Pickle," by John Tobias

Hungry for some? The good news is that pickled watermelon rind is easy to make or buy!

General Butt Naked

Strangely clothed in the photo above, General Butt Naked looks back on his life of naked warfare, child sacrifice and cannibalism and discovers that he has some regrets.

Link via Shaun.

Trouble at home drives man to...

Piracy!

At least that's what this Wikipedia entry claims of "The Gentleman Pirate," Stede Bonnet.

"Because of marital problems, and despite his lack of sailing experience, Bonnet decided to turn to piracy in the summer of 1717."

Hoff Update

First, E! is getting ready to spin some “Tales of the Hoff,” a Ryan Seacrest-produced scripted comedy starring David Hasselhoff. The project — part of E!’s previously announced move toward adding scripted programming into its mix — will follow the fictional dark and twisted trials and tribulations of an international icon as he navigates Hollywood and the world of dating after divorce.

Second, I have once again received a 2008 Hoff calendar which I share with all of you and encourage its dissemination.

Third, Todd Seavey's upcoming Reason article on nanotech, which details his visit to Scotland and meetings with leading nanotech scientists, features this odd tidbit: In his lab is a David Hasselhoff poster that says "I tried to save the world, but I forget to save myself. --The Hoff." Todd kept me apprised of the editing process and not only was this not cut from the article, the editors were interested in including a picture of the poster for, as Todd puts it, "the article... the article on nanotech."

And, last but not least, rumor has it that the Hoff should be appearing both Anaconda 3 and Anaconda 4.

Ginger Kids

The International Ginger Kids Foundation, or IGKF ,is a not-for-profit organization founded in 2002. The goal of the IGKF is to achieve equality, understanding, tolerance, and acceptance for Ginger Kids all over the world. Gingervitis is a serious disease affecting millions of people. Every day 1337 children are born with gingervitis in the United States alone. Not only do these special people have to struggle with a life long disease in which there is no known cure, they are often the target of ridicule and jokes. The only way we will ever find a cure is if we work together.

We are people too, even if we don't have souls.

An Infernal "Art" Machine

The Casino de Luxembourg has recently held a retrospective exhibition of Delvoye's defecating machines.

The whole family was there: Cloaca Original, Cloaca - New & Improved, Cloaca Turbo, Cloaca Quattro, Cloaca N° 5, Super Cloaca and Personal Cloaca. Plus original drawings, 3D and x-ray photographs, models of Cloaca Clinic gates, videos, sealed bags of Cloaca Faeces and other paraphernalia.

The brand new 8th Cloaca, Mini Cloaca, was premiered at the Casino. The tubular structure is made of metal and glass, and composed of mechanical organs that swallow, grind, digest and defecate a given amount of food. While Super Cloaca consumes 300 kg of food and produces 80 kg of faeces per day, the quantity of food ingested by the dwarfed one is equivalent to that of a breakfast.

Also be sure to check out the Cloaca testimonials and the gift shop, which includes a Wim Delvoye action figure with Cloaca toy, a Cloaca viewmaster, and Cloaca toiletpaper. Incidentally, when not devising new fecal machinations, Devoye also tattoos pigs.

More at We Make $ Not Art.

p.s. You don't even want to know how much freeze dried bags of Cloaca-doo are selling for. It will only make you sad.

Tod Holton, Super Green Beret!

For this little gem, I'm digging way back into the archives (it's on geocities for pete's sake!) of the intertubes to bring you something very special indeed: a page-by-page deconstruction of possibly the worst comic book ever produced: Tod Holton, Super Green Beret! I'll admit that the humor suffers in places, but for me that just adds to the spectacle of it all.

Hopefully, the image above doesn't somehow violate photobucket's terms of service as the photo of the fake testicles did in my first post.

When the Sunday Times Crossword Gets Old

Check out Music Cube - a nifty (and hard) pop music rebus game.

Yee-Haw!

Lasagna Cat, tributes to Jim Davis. More fun with Garfield.

Change the margins, change the world?

No doubt upsetting students everywhere trying to meet paper page requirements, Tamara Krinsky is spearheading a movement to save the environment by reducing default margin settings:

"As I was doing my usual margin-changin' thang while printing out a document for my boss, a light bulb went off in my brain. What if you could get people to adopt changing paper margins on a large scale? What if you could get companies to adopt narrower margins as their printing standard? It would result in a lot less paper consumption. Which of course means saving a lot of trees and cutting down on a lot of waste...but only if a massive amount of people changed their margins."

Anyone interested in starting a competing movement has a decent shot, as changethefontsize.com remains unregistered.

When Just Reading the Comics Isn't Enough

Geist's breath fogs the winter air as he surveys the frozen Minneapolis skyline, searching for signs of trouble. His long duster flaps in the breeze as his eyes flick behind reflective sunglasses; a wide-brim hat and green iridescent mask shroud his identity from those who might wish him harm.

Should a villain attack, the Emerald Enforcer carries a small arsenal to defend himself: smoke grenades, pepper spray, a slingshot, and a pair of six-inch fighting sticks tucked into sturdy leather boots. Leather guards protect Geist's arms; his signature weapon, an Argentinean cattle-snare called bolos, hangs from a belt-holster.
...
Soon Geist faces his first obstacle: parking on the left side of a one-way street. "Usually one of my superpowers is parallel parking," he chuckles as he eases his car into the spot, emerging victorious with a foot and a half between curb and tire. He feeds a gauntleted fistful of quarters into the parking meter, and then pops the trunk on the Geistmobile to retrieve his precious cargo. On the street, he encounters businesspeople on lunch break—some stare openly; others don't even notice his garish attire. "It's easier in winter," Geist says with a laugh. "Winter in Minnesota, everybody's dressed weird."

More on the lives of real life super heros. via HitAndRun

WoT continues

The War on Testicles that is. Legislators in Virginia and now Maryland have made outlawing the (mercifully) fake gonads that some truck and car owners have affixed to the rear bumpers of their vehicles a top legislative priority for 2008. Virginia's anti-nut crusader, Lionel Spruill, also sparked controversy a few years back when he tried to ban saggy pants.

That sort of thing isn't my bag, so to speak, but you can get balls for your vehicle here and here. The latter site (the source of the image above) describes truck balls as the "ultimate fashion statement" and has a fantastic intro video.

Via Freedom and Shit.

What is the bloop?

"Theories abound as to the source of the Bloop. If it is the vocalization of a living organism, it is one which makes its home in the dark, cold depths of the ocean. Some have suggested that giant squids could be responsible for the sound, but that is unlikely considering that no known species of cephalopod have the gas-filled sac necessary to reach such great volumes. Indeed science has not recorded any animals– living or extinct– with nearly enough size to house the organs needed to produce the level of output demonstrated by the Bloop… so unless this mystery creature uses some unknown mechanism to generate sound, it is presumed to be an incredibly massive organism."

Pearson to join PoF team

Thomas Pearson, aka PintPundit, is known for courting controversy by taking stands on important issues - such as the strong pro-Starbucks position shown above. What kind of message will he bring to Pieces of Flair readers? Stay tuned to find out!

Dining Out

Marton Theme Restaurant, named after the Chinese word "Matong" for toilet, has become a hit in Taiwan's second largest city since its opening in May 2004. Though bathroom decor seems a bizarre way to whet the appetites of diners, the idea has been so successful owner Eric Wang opened a second and bigger branch just seven months later. "We not only sell food but also laughter. The food is just as good as any restaurant but we offer additional fun," says 26-year-old Wang, who gave up a career in banking to launch the business. "Most customers think the more disgusting and exaggerated (the restaurant is), the funnier the dining experience is," he says.

In related news, India's "New Lucky Restaurant in Ahmadabad is famous for its milky tea, its buttery rolls, and the graves between the tables". Mmmmm mmmmm good.

SPs and what not

Are you a suppressive person or Potential Trouble Source who missed the Tom Cruise video on YouTube before the Church of Scientology pulled it? Thankfully, Defamer is stepping up to the plate with both full and "best of" versions to satisfy your antisocial tendencies.

I miss Moranis

Rick Moranis might not be in the movies anymore, but his new career is perfectly suited to re-working this number as a duet.

National security advice from Honeybee

Tom points out this gem from the Technology Liberation Front:

"I earlier suggested that the upcoming Heritage event on the REAL ID Act was a 'must miss' because it featured only national ID proponents.

"Since then, I have been turned on to Digimarc lobbyist Janice Kephart’s YouTube page. It’s a must see. She also has a MySpace page. The entertainment value of the Heritage event has risen."

The Return of MST3K

Cinematic Titanic is a project by Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K) creator and host, Joel Hodgson. The project involves "riffing" B-movies, like Mystery Science Theater 3000 before it. Joining Hodgson are many of the original MST3K cast, as well as some cast members who joined later in the show's run. These include Trace Beaulieu, J. Elvis Weinstein, Frank Conniff and Mary Jo Pehl.

Like Mystery Science Theater 3000, the series uses black silhouettes of the riffers placed over the movies, but in the case of Cinematic Titanic they sit on both sides of the screen rather than just on the lower right. Frank Conniff will have access to a lift so as to "interact" with the film, similar to Joel's frequent visual gags in Mystery Science Theater 3000. Host segments play a part in the series, but are not as integral to the show as they were to the prior series.

Penn is Back

After being disappointed by the abrupt end of PennFreeFM, I can now get my daily dose of Penn Jillette once again with Penn Says. With the aid of Sony camera placement, Penn is now airing unedited rants that are thoroughly entertaining (and spot on).

PETA's Cannabilism Prevention Program

Sheriff's officials were astounded Thursday by a letter requesting the man accused of murdering his girlfriend and possibly participating in cannibalism be placed on a vegetarian diet to keep him from being "involved in any senseless killing" while incarcerated.

The letter was faxed to the Smith County Sheriff's Jail from the national headquarters of the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals Thursday morning.
...

"It is up to you to prevent McCuin from contributing to any more suffering and death by placing him on a healthy, humane vegetarian diet," the letter by PETA Vice President Bruce Friedrich reads.
...

When asked how eating a hamburger compared to cannibalism, Friedrich said all meat is from a corpse. He further stated he believes McCuin could become violent if he ate meat and could kill.

The New Siskel & Ebert?

Reel Geezers. Juno is great BTW.

Fun With Veggies

The Vegetable Orchestra. If you haven't gotten your fill, here's a guy rocking out some broccoli, a carrot, a daikon, and a carrot/celery panflute. After perusing a few more youtube videos, I think we can safely blame this on Japan.

Mindblowing Architecture

I knew that Dubai and Kuwait were going a little gonzo on the construction of insanely large skyscrapers and whatnot, but this just made my jaw drop:



I want my flying car. Also in the works: a kilometer-high skyscraper, a bigger version of the entire Las Vegas strip, a building shaped like the death-star, and the world's largest themepark.

More here. Also via Dark Roasted Blend.

Extreme Sleeping

Like any extreme activity, it requires the nerves of steel, good choice of timing, location and the absence of suspicious cops. All this however is easier to achieve, because you are, well... asleep, so you can trust the unseen powers to take care of the rest. Long & restful sleep is by no means guaranteed, but perhaps somebody will take your picture and you'll wake up famous.

More popular than you might think. via Dark Roasted Blend

Blame Canada

Just a reminder of why nationalized health care is heinous.

David Lynch on the iPhone

If you enjoy David Lynch craziness, I can't recommend the "extras" DVD that accompanies Eraserhead too highly. For another fun celebrity rant, check out Pat Metheny's take on Kenny G.

Update David Lynch on product placement.

Me Going To Munch You

Take a break from the political noise for a heartfelt message from Cookie Monster.

Up to 30% off your Tax Bill (Also Taxable)

As tax season approacheth, consider the benefits of ratting out your fellow taxpayers who may not be willingly handing over their income to the benevolent IRS cronies. Credit to Zefrank.

Baby Toupee

The mission of BabyToupee is to show that while parenting can be a great responsibility, it can also be a source of endless amusement.

Huckabee Parody Ad

In related political news... I actually saw our friend from Alabama's name pop up on the Ron Paul "recent donor" screen. It really is a small world after all....

Hello Kitty Contacts

via Hello Kitty Hell

Sleeveface

Sleeveface is the art of “one or more persons obscurings or augmenting any part of the body or bodies with record sleeve(s) causing an illusion.”

Via Presurfer.

Orangina Hates You

I blame France for many things, but I never knew "encouraging furries" was on the list.

Thrift Shop Horrors

A blog devoted to the most disturbing thrift shop finds.

Merry Christmas Everyone

Your friends at PoF (with a little help from the Columbia Broadcasting System).

Science tattoos

Via the Presurfer: Not ready for a webcomic tattoo of Mr. Miro? Perhaps you can ease into the tat lifestyle with the help of science.

"On my blog, The Loom, I asked whether scientists wear many tattoos of their science. The answer was yes."

Why No One Wishes PETA a Merry Anything

Send a Michael Vick Holiday Snow Globe to your nearest and dearest courtesy of those merchants of merriment and good-sheer, PETA.
Via Hit and Run.

Incidentally, only PETA's campaign against the Olsen twins has actually succeeded in the nearly impossible feat of making me sympathize with them. Way to go PETA.

The Dean and Company Christmas Special

This gem comes from Tom, who is fortunate enough to drink from the same city water supply as the people featured in the video:

"This particular atrocity is homegrown. Dean & Company is produced by a local Birmingham family with too much money and time on their hands. Keep in mind that this travesty continues to be perpetrated on the good people of Birmingham...you won't be able to look away as the trainwreck unfolds."

Movie Rumors: Real Genius Sequel in the Making

"It looks like Val Kilmer will be Chris Knight once again! Kilmer has reportedly signed on to star in a sequel to the 1985 comedy, 'Real Genius'."

I can't decide if I love or hate this idea.

Soccer star pens Nietzsche tome

Chester City Midfielder Craig Dove has more than football on his mind. In an as of yet unreleased work apparently co-authored with Friedrich Nietzsche, Dove offers to guide us down the corridors of Nietzsche's most central ideas. For a mere $82, you can pre-order your copy now!

Congrats, Craig!

Handsoap

Via Geekologie: "this is actual soap. shaped like little hands! each ‘hand’ is carefully hand made & packaged just for you. each set is slightly different with different hand-shapes & skin-ish colors. wash your hands with hands. really quite lovely! (& a little creepy)"

Freaky Ads

AdFreak is looking for the freakiest ad of 2007 and is slowly whittling down the list. There is no shortage of contenders.

When Philosophers Attack

Everything has a purpose

According to one reviewer: "Of all the movies I've seen about sensitive, talking excrement, this is the best." Get your copy today.

Making cows pass kangaroo gas

Via DoL: "Australian scientists are trying to give kangaroo-style stomachs to cattle and sheep in a bid to cut the emission of greenhouse gases blamed for global warming, researchers say. Thanks to special bacteria in their stomachs, kangaroo flatulence contains no methane and scientists want to transfer that bacteria to cattle and sheep who emit large quantities of the harmful gas."

Not everyone agrees that bacteria transfer is the simplest option. Instead, they suggest just eating kangaroos instead of cows.

Tractor Fight!!!

Unlikely Pop-Up Books

From the Something Awful forums.

Competition for Pandora?

Via the WSJ: "The new Slacker players will come in three models, ranging from $200 to $300, depending on capacity. But the music they play will be absolutely free, contained in preprogrammed Internet radio stations instead of individually selected songs and albums. The stations will be automatically refreshed with new tunes via a wireless connection built right into the device. You'll have to be near a hot spot for these updates. But you won't need a hot spot just to hear your music, because the songs are cached on the device. And you'll never have to plug it into a computer.

"The player is tied to Slacker's free Internet radio service, slacker.com, which is already up and running, and allows you to listen to music via any standard Windows or Mac Web browser. Using the service, you can personalize your player by selecting from over 100 canned stations or by creating stations based around any of 10,000 artists. These stations will be beamed to your player wirelessly. You can even choose which stations are loaded onto your player before the company ships it to you."

Don't eat the pink snow

"The snow even has a fresh watermelon scent and is sometimes called 'watermelon snow.' Walking in pink snow often results in a temporary discoloration of your clothing, such as bright red soles and pinkish pant cuffs. There are unconfirmed reports that consuming 'generous quantities' of pink snow may cause diarrhea, a rather distressing situation above timberline."

Time for a celebrity endorser kickboxing match

Apparently, Chuck Norris announced his endorsement of GOP presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. Following on the heels of Oprah's endorsement of Obama and Streisand's endorsement of Clinton, it seems only fitting that some sort of endorser cage match be arranged. Will Drew Carey enter the fray for Ron Paul? More importantly, which candidate will secure the endorsement of Royce Gracie?

Alternative Christian Products for the Saved and Unsaved Alike

For all our Div. School readers: this site will pretty much take care of all your holiday shopping needs.

Kitty Wigs

I think furries might be less disturbing.

Technoviking

Via The Presurfer: Teach for America alum Marty Mudd takes a stroll down Cherry Street in Helena, Arkansas.

Victory!

The Colorado Supreme Court issued a favorable ruling in Cornerstone v. Wheat Ridge Urban Renewal Authority today. The credit for the amicus brief really goes to Tim, but this makes me feel like getting that law license was all worthwhile.

Tesla Xmas Tree

I am in UR living room, frying UR Santa.

More Ron Paul Hotness

I just got canvassed by Ron Paul supporters. They asked if I would consider being a district delegate. It's very tempting...

Tune in next week for the liberty orgy.

Things I've Never Thought Of...

One little tow hitch, so many options. How can one possibly choose between expressing political beliefs, stashing a key, attaching obnoxious animatronics, installing a handy bottle opener, or mounting a giant flatscreen? Thankfully, my current lack of a tow hitch saves me from having to make such difficult choices.

30 Brilliantly Timed Sports Photos

Some great pics.