Pieces of Flair

When I worked at a certain nonprofit-on-the-Hudson, we would occasionally get bizarre letters, phone calls, and even visits from complete nut jobs. Those familiar with "the movement" know exactly what I mean. Anyhow, someone passed along this email today which I felt compelled to share:

Dear [So-and-so],

Yes, I should be in Houston, Texas the week of February 13th. I am eager to appear by tape or by video-conferencing.

For me to travel to the DC area, I would insist on all transportation and hotel accommodations being paid, and I'm not willing to travel by scheduled airliner or any other means whereby my privacy would be outraged. A small private plane or a car with driver would be fine with me, and should be arrangeable for less than the cost of a round trip airline ticket. Let me know if you'd like me to help with these arrangements, since I know many private pilots and drivers.

Please be aware that on Tuesday 20 January 2004 at about 14:30 I was attacked and severely beaten by Houston Police officers. I was handcuffed and kicked in the face repeatedly. As a result of injuries sustained and the refusal of prompt surgical attention, I suffered permanent disfigurement. My nose was broken and my eyebrow cut open, so I am not as physically attractive as some of my photos suggest.

Regards,

[Man less physically attractive than photo would suggest.]