War on terror got you down? Adopt a Sniper

Who loves the chocolate? Michael Malice, that's who.

Got my bumper stickers in today. They are much what you'd expect, though I find the "TheBumperSticker.com" that appears on all of them to be a little annoying. They made up for it by including two extra stickers in the pack. Now to find an appropriate place to put a "The Rockefeller Foundation: Funding Revolutionary Leftists Since 1913" sticker...

Here's an interesting blog post about North Korea's Ryugyong Hotel that you can file under more bizarre communist trivia.

The Childhood Goat Trauma Foundation

Here's a fun new video from Fatboy Slim: Slash Dot Dash

C'est tres bien. Le Prince Bleu

Hurricane Bjorn

The Many Faces of Kerry

In a desperate attempt to make philosophy appealing to the masses, David Chalmer's has a page devoted to zombies.

In related news, I recommend Shaun of the Dead. It was no Evil Dead, but pretty funny.

Here's a great critique of everyone's favorite xenophobe, Michelle Malkin.

Because ninjas need love too: www.singleninjas.com

Reason #585...



Klingons for Kerry Credit to Todd via Volokh.com for the link

Along the lines of Zladko Vladcik's Electronic Supersonic, it's MC Yuri with In Da Cab... um.. yeah.

Something tells me he's no Steven Seagal


Robert Downey Jr goes pop

Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy a la Zork circa 1982.

"The South Is Gone A Rise Again"

Speaking of questionable sanity...



Here are "The Young Hipublicans." At least they're not Gothublicans.

There's a good Q&A with Michael Badnarik over at Slashdot that makes him seem mostly sane.

On a lighter note: Bathtime in Clerkenwell

This is also quite delightful: Mad World

This is a good piece on the recent Rather scandal and the lameness of network news in general. Rather Irrelevant

Most of us regard network anchors as faintly pompous talking heads, people who read other people's prose off teleprompters. But the anchors, rather extraordinarily, still regard themselves as the conscience of the nation. They aren't mere 'journalists' who have to use authentic documents to prove their allegations but rather people whose fame and large paychecks and unchallenged power entitle them to some kind of automatic credibility, even if their documents are fake.

I for one can't wait for network news to go the way of the Dodo.

This is much more entertaining than throwing buckets of paint or peeing all over everything.

How to lose friends and alienate people



"A souped up Chevy Camaro owned by David Koresh, the slain leader of the Branch Davidian religious sect, will be sold at a Texas auction this weekend, the auctioneer said on Wednesday.

"The 500-horsepower Camaro was Koresh's everyday car and has dents from an FBI tank that struck it during the April 19, 1993 raid in which he and 80 Davidians died and their Waco, Texas compound burned to the ground, said Daniel Kruse of vintage car firm Kruse International.

"The 1968 model 'muscle' car with a powerful 427-cubic-inch motor has the words 'DAVID'S 427 GO GOD' stamped on the engine block.

"'This is history,' Kruse said. 'This is what David Koresh was all about.'"

Fun with glue and paper



The happy economists at Divisionoflabour.com pointed this page out. I know it's hard to beat "Don't steal - The government hates competition," but these bumper stickers provide some decent attempts. If you can't get enough of this sort of thing, InstantAttitudes has some as well.

Staying inside the lines



Bonny Doon Beach in California recently made headlines as the location of a nude beach clean-up effort. Continuing with the coloring book theme, kids will be excited that they can color all of their favorite nudists with the Original Bonny Doon Beach Coloring Book. One nagging question remains, though. Just who is making all of the rip-off Bonny Doon Beach Coloring Books?

Maybe it's my affinity for puzzles or a desire to see something interesting the next time I have to drive through Kansas, but try as I might, I can't help being just a bit giddy looking at these corn mazes. Although as with any form of expression, it does have its drawbacks.

The government tries to out-gross Garbage Pail Kids



From Cruel.com - it's good to find out that the CDC is trying to engage children with their collectible set of disease cards. Included is such helpful advice as "PLEASE don't swim when you have diarrhea." Be sure to check out Set 2 - now with even more deformities that kids will love to trade and keep.

For more fun with the CDC, check out the Rabies section of the kids' page. Lots of good pics of infected animals, plus a nifty coloring book. The coloring book, though, violates the principle that "if you don't want kids to do something, you shouldn't make it look fun."

This is just for all you Simpsons fans out there. Someone put together an incredibly detailed map of Springfield. And, no, I don't remember that one time when something happened, because I never saw that episode, so just stop asking.

Reasons #583 & #584 to hate democracy:

I've received an RNC faux "gold card" for my great contributions to the Republican party, and just today I opened my mail to discover an 8"x10" color glossy of the Johns thanking me for my support.

I belong to neither party and I've never contributed a dime. Good thing we have matching funds for this kind of crap.

I know what I want this Christmas: The Godfather horse head prop pillow

Welcome to fetopia.

Glancing at Drudge's latest unflattering picture of Kerry, I had the modest epiphany that he looks like a guy who's already gone through a presidency, not one who's just entered the running. Think of the Bill Clinton before and after and I think you'll agree that Kerry's already had his life force sucked dry by the political process and is just a shell of a human being.

OMG!!! OMG!!! BESTEST THING EVER!!!!
Well, ok, maybe not, but it's pretty cool: Tim Minear (of Angel, Firefly & Wonderfalls fame) is adapting Heinlein's The Moon is a Harsh Mistress for the big screen.

While I'm not normally a big fan of commercials, you really must check out these bizarre cigarette commercials made for British American tobacco by major directors. While we're on the topic, you might also enjoy this collection of David Lynch commercials.

Eyes on the prize



Adam Quan's "How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide for Asian Men" is well-reviewed on Amazon. Consider the following comments:

"I built the machine according to Mr. Quan's detailed instructions, spliced into the local power grid, and flipped the switch. AMAZING!

My house is now COVERED in white women of every size and age, and more are attracted every day. You can see my house from the expressway now, the pile is so huge.

THANK YOU, Adam Quan! Your machine has truly changed my life, and also the lives of countless others in my immediate vicinity."

Sanguinarius: Problems Vampires Have

Because this site doesn't get enough hits for "gay porn"...
Reason #582 to hate democracy: this election will be determined by either the Amish or gay porn stars.

Apparently, there's a picture of me under "wholesome" in the dictionary.



On two separate occasions today, two different guys said "fuck" in my presence, covered their mouths, and then quickly uttered an apology. One of these guys is serving time in federal prison.

This blog needs more readers.

Doing a Lynndie

Neato.

Just testing the email feature of blogger.

 

If I haven't seen you in the last few weeks, then you've probably missed out on my big news: I'm preg... kidding. I'm moving to Colorado and clerking for one of the state supreme court justices next fall. My Manhattan days are numbered, folks. It's been lovely.

The new trailer for Team America: World Police is up.

The airbrush is not a miracle worker



"This is a collection of actual senior photos that I found on various senior photography gallery websites. I've altered the images to conceal the identities of those involved, because the real shame lies with the photographers."

Losers descend upon Ohio to defend nerdly "honour"



"The people engaged in 'mortal combat' with foam weaponry on most Sunday afternoons in the soccer field off Olde Ridenour Road in Gahanna are members of Rivendell, the local realm of a 27-year-old nationwide live-action role-playing group called Dagorhir. Participants take on persona names and stage battle games based loosely -- in some cases very loosely -- on Tolkien's work, with elements of the Middle Ages sometimes tossed in.

"Rivendell averages a dozen or so for Sunday combats and has around 14 paid-up members, some of whom first learned of the group's existence from the Web site. 'We get about 25 percent of our members that way,' McCracken said.

"'A lot of the guys here are role players, Dungeons and Dragons players or computer gamers,' realm leader Andin said. 'Now they can stop sitting at their desks and go out to see if they have what it takes for real.'

"Or as real as warriors whose weapons were crafted by a 'foam smith' can make things.

"'Dagorhir's participants include a vast range of people, including college professors and high school students, construction workers and accountants, computer geeks and goths.'

"Members of the various chapters, sometimes called "realms," gather each year in, of all places, Ohio for an epic battle they call Ragnarok. The 10th annual version of what amounts to controlled mayhem with foam weapons is scheduled for June 19-26, 2005, at the Spring Valley Campground in Cambridge.

"The Buckeye State was chosen for this honor, according to the Web site, as the result of a challenge issued from the leader of a Midwestern chapter, Beowulf, to his opposite in the D.C. area, Graymael. The dialogue, according to the Web site, went like this:

"Bey: I know you Washington Dagorhir think you're tough, but you've never seen anything like us. You couldn't handle us if you ever had to fight Middle Earth! We send people flying through the air. Grown men weep when they see us coming.

"Gray: No way! We'd kick your collective (the rest can probably be guessed).

"Bey: Oh, yeah:

"Gray: Yeah!

"Bey: I'm in Illinois. You're in Maryland. What's halfway between the two?

"Gray: Uh, Ohio?

"Bey: Then it's settled. We'll fight in Ohio."

MirrorBall Man

As long as we're on a Bush theme, here he is singing U2's "Sunday Bloody Sunday."

George W. Bush Garden Gnomes

Drill yourself a third eye



The movie Pi made it popular with all the kids. Now, with a little help from ITAG, trepanation is spreading the globe like wildfire. What are you waiting for?

Fun news for all you new parents, having kids dropped your IQ.

Nicole: Good thing you passed the bar first, dumbass.

All these years, I've really been thinking about haircuts far too narrowly. Tans Barbers.com

"Vengeance is mine," says 9-year old


(dramatic re-enactment)

"A 6-foot-tall, 275-pound bearded man crashed a children's birthday party in Oak Forest, identified himself as 'vengeance,' then helped himself to a piece of cake, police said.

"When the owner of the home asked the man who he was, the intruder replied, 'I am vengeance. I am the knight. I am Batman.' Then the man went into the kitchen, cut a piece of birthday cake, took it into the living room and ate it.

"After continued questioning by the homeowner, the man left the house and drove off in a red 1988 Cadillac."

Although my PC has finally been delivered, I thought I'd continue the postal theme by directing your attention to the Smoking Gun's brilliant piece on the Postal Service's new pilot program to sell personalized stamps.

The best of all possible worlds



The A-Team Resolves Lapses in Homeland Security

"Threat: Terrorists detonate bomb loaded with nuclear materials in heavily populated area.

"Solution: Murdock and Face knock on door of terrorist sleeper cell disguised as pest-control authorities. Meanwhile, Hannibal unleashes cockroaches in air vents to give terrorists the willies. Murdock and Face gain entry. While terrorists' attention is diverted, replace radioactive materials with horse manure. Later, when bomb detonates harmlessly, have B.A. deliver line, 'Now that's what I call a dirty bomb.'"